Resource: KFUO Radio Library

I will be a guest on Faith and Family produced by Worldwide KFUO. The host, Andy Bates, and I will be discussing creative play and brain development on Monday, November 3, 2014, at 10:00am, central time.

I want to point you to KFUO’s On-demand programs. These are archived sessions you can listen to at your convenience. Topics include advice for fathers, special needs children, using movies to teach, children and mobile devices, recommendations for apps, and much more!

I especially enjoyed a discussion on language development and the importance of reading to your children. 

The provocative title of this session is “How to Nurture Children with Theological Language."

Resource:Singing!

Check out this free app from Raising Children Network. It us a great way to introduce more music to your child's routine.

Music is strongly connected to language and cognitive development. Music helps us to make and retrieve long term memories. Children who sing have better reading, math, and thinking skills.

This app can help you sing with your children if you feel a bit shy about belting out a favorite nursery rhyme. For older children, play the oldies station or the Christian music station and teach them to sing along with your favorites. No one has to be embarrassed in the car - or at least everyone is a captive audience.

Think how important it is to have faith songs tucked away in long term memory. They will reappear at just the right time.

Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. (James 5: 13b, ESV)

Share Your Faith: Imitators

You became imitators of us and of the Lord. I Thessalonians 1:6a

To imitate means to copy.  The baby in this video wants to imitate Dad. This is how babies learn. They watch their parents and brother and sisters, copy what they see, and with practice they get better.

We all learn this way. We imitate our parents, our grandparents, our teachers, and other people we admire.

In this Bible verse, Paul and his missionary friends are reminding members of a church that we should imitate the Lord.

The best way to know what the Lord would do is to read the Bible. When we read God’s word, listen to God’s word, pray God’s word, and sing God’s word, we learn how to imitate Jesus. This is how God teaches us and how God makes our faith grow.

When you have an assignment at school the teacher wants you to do the work on your own. But, when God gives you an assignment, He helps you get the work done! When you read the Bible the Holy Spirit is working in you to develop your faith.

Make plans for this week to spend time with the Bible. Talk about God’s Word with your parents. The Holy Spirit will work in you to help you to be an imitator of the Lord.

Parenting: Technology

As an early childhood teacher of many years and a student of cognitive psychology, this picture makes me more than a little nervous. It is not so much what the children are doing - technology is a part of our world and they are exploring and learning.

What bothers me is what they are NOT doing. They are not moving around, they are not breathing fresh air and integrating sensory information, they are not talking, they are not playing with each other. All of these activities are essential for healthy development and learning.

It is interesting to note that when Steve Jobs, founder of Apple, was asked how his children liked the iPad he responded: "They haven't used it. We limit how much technology our kids use at home."

I am not one of those who believe that technology ruins brain development. I believe that technology encourages a different kind of development. 

I am not one of those who believe that technology stifles creativity. I believe technology can inspire as much creativity as crayons and paint - you just need to find apps that give the equivalent of a blank piece of paper instead of a coloring book page with lines. 

However, I do know that God's plan for how children learn has not changed because we have developed technology for even the youngest among us to use. Children still need to talk, to run around, to create things with found objects, to imagine they are someone else. They need to sing, shout, and argue. They need to make mistakes and get into trouble. They need to problem solve and learn to get past failure.

They need to play.

Technology is great, but don't let it replace childhood.   

 

Sharing Your Faith: Mercy

I just love watching this cat clip. If it makes you laugh it is because we tend to laugh at things that are unexpected. The cat opens its mouth and we expect a “meow” but we hear a “honk” instead.

In the Bible story about Joseph and his brothers, (Genesis 37-45) we hear Joseph say something we do not expect. Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery and then lied to their father. Joseph ended up in prison before God’s plan for him played out. Joseph was the number two ruler in Egypt when his brothers came to him for food for their starving families.

We would expect Joseph to say angry things. We would expect him to deny his brothers food and instead throw them into prison.

But the words that came out of Joseph’s mouth were words of mercy.

So Joseph said to his brothers, “Come near to me, please.” And they came near. And he said, “I am your brother, Joseph, whom you sold into Egypt. And now do not be distressed or angry with yourselves because you sold me here, for God sent me before you to preserve life. (Genesis 45: 4-5, ESV)

Because Joseph had forgiveness from God, he was able to forgive his brothers for the terrible things they did to him.

You are also forgiven by God and God can help you to say the unexpected. The next time a brother or sister, or a classmate, does something mean, let the words that  come out of your mouth show mercy. Let them be unexpected. Let your words be kind and forgiving.

God will help you. 

The reaction you get just might be unexpected, too.

Share Your Faith: Strength

A soda can is stronger than it looks. As you can see from this picture, even an empty can is strong enough to support the weight of an adult.

That is because the shape of a can (a cylinder) is a strong shape. It is strong because it is round. If a can was a square column it would have weak points along the corners.

Go ahead and stand on the empty soda can. It should easily hold your weight as long as the sides are smooth and straight.

Push in the sides of the can with your fingers and try to stand on it.

Now, you should be able to crush the can easily. When you pushed in the sides of the can, even a little bit, you made a shape different from a cylinder and you took away its strength.

Be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. (Ephesians 6:10b, ESV)

When we are strong in the Lord it is because of the faith God has given us. There are two ways to grow faith: through Word and Sacrament.

When you were Baptized God named you as His child and the Spirit made your faith grow.

Read, hear, study, say, or sing God’s Word and the Spirit uses the Word to make your faith grow.

Don’t let the problems of this world crush you. Find time each day to read God’s word. God’s Spirit will work in you to make your faith strong.

You will be strong in the Lord!

Here is another cool can crushing experiment to do with your parents. 

   

Parenting: Conflict

Nearly every parent has experienced relief at dropping children off at school because it meant a few sweet hours free of conflict. There are days, sometimes weeks, when siblings seem to be engaged in a competition to find the most inane topic for argument.

“He looked at me.”

“Her finger is touching my side of the car.”

“She won’t let me . . .”

“He says I can’t . . .”

“Tell her not to . . .”

Or, my personal favorite:

“He’s thinking about hitting me!”

These are just things I remember from my childhood, I haven’t even started on the phrases my children used that caused my neck muscles to tense and my temples to throb.

These selfish, sometimes ridiculous spats, are ample proof that children are sinners living in a sinful world. So what do we do about the fighting?

Make them play. 

Resist the temptation to separate the combatants. (Unless what they really need most is a nap.) Put away the electronic devices that keep each child quietly entertained. Send them outside, or to the playroom. Give them a board game, a ball, or a large cardboard box and make them play.

Let them play because when they play they learn how to deal with conflict. Play offers children a unique opportunity to observe, try solutions, and learn about their feelings in a relatively safe environment. Some days when I supervised school recess, I wondered if play wasn’t just a series of small spats interspersed with an occasional good idea.  I probably wasn’t too far off in my evaluation.

When children play they get a chance to acknowledge (and announce) their feelings. They get to make choices and see the good and bad consequences. They get to think about alternatives and learn to make plans. They get to learn how to identify the problem, regulate emotions, and learn what they can and cannot control. Fighting at home, or on the playground, teaches them better solutions for social interaction.

Play gives them practice in conflict resolution.

 

If you find you need to step into a sibling squabble ask your children to talk to each other and start with this phrase:

I don’t like it when you . . . 

Help them to identify feelings and possible solutions – then let them try the solutions.

 

As you can see from this verse, even St. Paul had to deal with tattling and conflict.

For it has been reported to me by Chloe's people that there is quarreling among you, my brothers. (I Corinthians 1:11, ESV)

God will bless you and your children in play, prayer, and patience.

And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. (II Timothy 2: 24-25a, ESV)

Here is a great article that talks more about the benefit of play and conflict resolution skills.